General Custer Misunderstood
Erm... Run. Far. Away.
By Charles F. GrayOctober 14, 2003
Amongst
the most infamous and most misunderstood games for the Atari 2600 is the adult
game Custer's Revenge. Why you ask? Because of the unfavorable opinion
regarding one General Custer in the Atari 2600 game. Some players view him as a
villain, others a pervert, and yet others a hero. Let's explore this complex and
equally interesting game character who captures the minds and hearts of a
multi-generation of game players.
Custer’s Revenge was released by Mystique as an erotic adult game to
be played by adults during the height of popularity for the Atari 2600 Game
system. The game focuses on the notorious General Custer braving flying arrows
over a desert landscape to have his way with the captured Indian maiden. The box
cover and cartridge label further portray General Custer as a pale, hairy, and
perverted sex fiend looking to get the all time high score. The maiden is shown
as the opposite of Custer. She is illustrated as the virginal, tanned, and
captured beauty bound by rope to a post in the hot desert sun. It is
understandable why so many game players view our good General in a tainted
light.
Once the cartridge
is put in the game machine, the graphics show an entirely different story. The
pure maiden is far from pure and I would dare to say that she resembles the most
experienced porn starlet. Her full breasts thrust towards Custer and her rounded
buttocks beacon mankind’s basic sexual instinct. She is no longer tied to the
post and yet she waits with her mouth open wanting, waiting, and needing the
hard embrace of her lover. And looking at General Custer, he is no longer the
corrupted devil (as seen on the box cover) but is instead the good man, the
strong man, the gentleman with his soft swagger and his cowboy hat fluttering in
the desert wind. All vestiges of Custer as the villain are removed, for how can
it be villainous to want and desire reunification with a lover? It cannot be.
There is a common misconception that General Custer tied up the Indian maiden
to have sex with her as some kind of right of war. This assumption is entirely
false and has clouded and corrupted the image of General Custer. In truth, the
tribal forces tied up the Indian maiden nude and left her to die due to her and
Custer’s forbidden interracial relationship. General Custer is in fact
attempting to rescue the voluptuous maiden from the hostile tribal forces.
Custer suspecting that his plight to rescue the maiden is hopeless, attempts to
save her from a slow death of exposure and starvation regardless of the cost to
his own personal safety.
Aimee Manns's song
"Save Me" comes to mind when I see the heroic and equally brave General Custer
rescuing the tied-up maiden from hostile tribal forces. General Custer is in an
hostile territory, alone (Atari-Custer Theory suggests that his army has been
killed at this point), dodging a barrage of arrows and facing immanent death.
Custer realizing that his men are dead, braves all odds to be with his lover one
last time before death takes them both. The real General Custer was out manned
at the battle of Little Big Horn, so I suspect Custer's Revenge is
supposed to be Custer's last stand and dare I say last screw before he is killed
at a battle he could never possibly win.
So let's take off our hats and put them to our chest and pay tribute to a
challenging game and a brave game character who went against all odds to get one
final screw with the beautiful Indian Maiden before death finally took him and
his erection away.
Let us remember that love is not a crime, but it is human.
